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A funny version found on KiowaPilots.com by Sparky2

In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. And the earth was without form, and void; nor were there even Victor Airways. And darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.

And God said, Let there be light: and there was light. And God saw the light, that it was good: and God divided the light from the darkness. And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. He maketh the light of day come way too soon, verily, and the fall of night he also called, Miller Time. And the evening and the morning were the first day.

And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters. And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which were under the firmament from the waters which were above the firmament: and it was so. And God called the firmament Heaven. Heaven is surely a wet place to this day, it all depends on from wherest thou calls home. Humid, clearly, at the very least. And the evening and the morning were the second day.

And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry land appear: and it was so. And God called the dry land Earth; and the gathering together of the waters called he Seas: On the land he maketh the hangars and runways, and a multitude of smaller taxiways dotted with little blue lights, and God made the seas dark and deep, and just about right for carriers and fast frigates. And God saw that it was good.

And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth, and do not forget the hops and barley for the making of beer: and it was so. And God saw that it was good. And the evening and the morning were the third day.

And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years: he made the stars also. And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth, And to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness, and to provide ambient illumination for night flights and Field Grade NVG qualifications: and God saw that it was good. And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.

And God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl that may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven. And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, except for where the cursed fisherman may languish, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that it was good. And God blessed them, saying, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply in the earth, but just watch out for aircraft engine intakes, and mostly look out for hunters, they will surely strike thee down and eat thy flesh over a charcoal grill. And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.

And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so. And God made the beast and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth became fodder for steaks, chops, tenderloin and burger: and God saw that it was good. And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over the grill and hearth, and over a great assortment of backyard barbeque accessories, not the least of which is vessel of ice and beers.

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: stay together for a number of years at least, before the shadow of doubt and mistrust, and darkness and divorce befall you, but in the meantime, have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the whole business of shopping for groceries, sundries, and draperies and such upon the earth.

And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which is upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which is the fruit of the plant yielding barley and hops; to you it shall be for beer. And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that needeth hauling or transport somewhere, wherein there is a mission of some import, I have given you the UH-1 Iroquois, and it was so.

And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day. Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and the man and woman who would soon be turning JP-4 into noise, and making a great rattling noise yea even after Quiet Hours, and over all the host of ungrateful taxpayers. And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made.

And God blessed the seventh day, and sanctified it: because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made. These are the generations of the sports teams and the sports fans who love them, in the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens, he layeth down on the couch to watch some NFL, and to slake his thirst there was the beer, and there was not a wife in the heavens to complain, and it was good.

But there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground, although it did clear up by lunchtime. And the LORD God formed base-fields, stage-fields, gunnery ranges and heliports of the dust of the ground, and offered them a marginal budget for upkeep; and Army Aviation was born.

And the LORD God planted a training center eastward of Mississippi, just west of Elba; and there he put the man whom he had formed. And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every pine tree that is pleasant to the sight, and multitudes of peanuts, and also convenience stores and used car lots. The tree of life also in the midst of the garden, known as the Operators Manual of knowledge of good and evil. And a river went out of the garden; and from thence it was parted, and became into a fishing lake with an unreliable spillway.

And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the UH-1 to fly it and to keep it regularly aloft. And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: And of the Operators Manual of the knowledge of good and evil, thou must study thusly: for in the day that thou slacken in thy studies thou shalt surely die.

And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should fly the Huey and the Huey alone; I will make him an aircraft fleet of skid, light of fuel capacity, short of tail rotor authority, and small of engine.
And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam and he slept: and he took one of the Huey’s rib-spars, and closed up the sheet metal instead thereof; And the rib-spar, which the LORD God had taken from Huey, made he a Kiowa, and brought it unto the man.

And Adam said, This is now more like it: she shall be called Kiowa, because she was taken out of Iroquois, not that that necessarily makes any sense. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall go off to flight school, and pursue the Scout Track, and whenever he is not deployed overseas, he shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. For he was a Kiowa Pilot.

And it was very good.

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